Your eyes do not deceive you – the “Predictions Before the Nominations” series is back! Five years later, this iconic staple of Planet Whiz Kid has made its grand return to . . . WAIT!

Everything you has just learned . . . is a lie!

Annually, I make sure to write a post predicting the Oscar winners, usually on the eve of the Academy Awards ceremony. However, back in the Golden Age, I used to publish my theorizations (a fancier word for “theories”) on who the nominees would be, as well. Alas, that was on the old Planet Whiz Kid, which infamously crashed in January of 2019, leading to the birth of a newer, more efficient “revival site” as I call it. (Challenge: do a search on this website to see how many times I’ve mentioned this traumatic incident.)

However, I have moved on! And I’m ready to present my official predictions for the 95th Academy Awards nominees, slated to be announced tomorrow, January 24th. This was by far the year that I did the most amount of research regarding the top-tier awards contenders. I started investigating back in August, and I hope all that digging will lead to a gold mine! (A.K.A. a $5 bet I made with my dad.)

The largest percentage I’ve accomplished relating to nomination predictions is 79.5% for the 2020 Academy Awards. For reference, last year’s was 73.4% – however, my winner prognoses were the best yet at 95.6%. I only got one category wrong, and it was a frustrating one: Best Animated Short. It wasn’t even dramatic! I knew halfway through the show that I wouldn’t achieve the bejeweled 100% mark. (And for you fact-checkers out there who claim that I lost the Best Picture category because I initially predicted The Power of the Dog as the winner instead of CODA, the joke’s on you! I changed my answer moments before the show began!)

This year, I’m confident that my research will pay off! So, let’s to the predictions . . . right after some brief entertainment news!

We’re going to bring in Walt the Box Office Guy, who’s filling in for Brad the Box Office Guy, who’s filling in for Paul the Box Office Guy, who has yet to be seen since March of 2021.

Whiz Kid: Howdy, Walt!
(*pause*)
Walt: Hi.
Whiz Kid: How are you today? How's January treating you?
(*pause*)
Walt: Good.
Whiz Kid: Oh-kay. So, I heard that a certain 3D movie about water starring blue people which shall remain nameless just crossed $2 billion worldwide. Can you tell us more about that?
Walt: Well . . . it's a movie. Must be good if people are watching it.
Whiz Kid: Wow, you're getting wordy! Do you think this film could usurp Avengers: Infinity War at the box office?
Walt: Maybe.
Whiz Kid: Care to elaborate?
Walt: Nah.
Whiz Kid: Alright then. Are there any exciting releases to look forward to as we near February?
Walt: YES! DEFINITELY! You NEED to see Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey! It's the most hotly-anticipated slasher gore-fest of 2023! It is a MUST-SEE! It's based off the Winnie-the-Pooh books, which obviously incorporated gothic horror elements. Starring Pooh and Piglet as two bloodthirsty killers on a carnage-filled rampage! WATCH IT!
Whiz Kid: That's not really my type of movie . . .
Walt: Well, make it your type of movie! You don't want to get on my bad side!
Whiz Kid: Yikes. Very good, then. Thanks, Walt!
Walt: Whatever.

What I wanted Walt to get to was the fact that Avatar: The Way of Water just crossed $2 billion yesterday. It’s now the sixth highest-grossing film of all time and the first film to crack $2 billion in two-and-a-half years. It could overtake Avengers: Infinity War and Star Wars: The Force Awakens by the end of the month!

Those of you who have been reading PWK for awhile know my highly credible theory that James Cameron (director of the Avatar films) has been plotting for decades to take down Star Wars. After a shocking walkout from Cameron’s team in 2019, he’s all on his own now (save for the faithful Sigourney Weaver). Cameron is obviously tinkering with the box office numbers to give people the impression that Avatar is still a thing. It’s been 13 years, Jimmy, wake up!

Anyway, in other stories, the Sundance Film Festival is currently playing in Utah. This allows for some lesser-known indie films to step into the spotlight and have the chance to win a coveted prize at the end of it!

Additionally, a brand-new trailer for Season 3 of The Mandalorian aired during Monday Night Football last week and shattered records, garnering over 83 million views within 24 hours of dropping. This surpassed the previous record holder, the main trailer for Obi-Wan Kenobi, which received almost 58 million views. People are excited for Mando and Baby Yoda to return! This is my most-anticipated TV show for 2023, so I’ll be among the first to watch it when the first episode releases on Disney+ on March 1.

Finally, tickets for Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania are now on sale. You’d better buy them quickly, as the newest MCU blockbuster is headed for a strong opening when it comes out on February 17. After all, who doesn’t want to see Bill Murray as a quantum lord?

Now that we’ve cleared that out of the way, it’s time for predictions! So let’s get to it!

Starting with . . .

The Shorts